What’s gonna be left of the world, if you’re not in it?

So, firstly, I’m sorry for not updating you lately. If I’m totally honest, I’ve not felt like it, not really felt able to, and then work got in the way. I know that’s shit, but unfortunately, it’s the way my damn life is!

So – let’s update you on duloxetine. I’ve never been SO damn glad to be off something! I mean, don’t get me wrong, when I was on it, that was fine. But I have never experienced anything like that before whilst I was coming off it. Dizziness, sickness, confusion, headaches, brain zaps, the works. Unrelenting! I’m now on Escitalopram, which currently is making me not sleep properly, and potentially giving me some dizzy spells and headaches too, yay! Aren’t I lucky?

The other thing I’ve noticed is quite how much that the duloxetine was covering up pain! Now I’m off them, my back, shoulders, legs and knees hurt like hell, and I have no idea why. Have mentioned it to my doctor, so will keep you guys updated on that one.

Currently, my mood’s pretty bad. I’m extremely irritable, and just want to snap heads off people (more so than usual!) and shout back, rather than taking a breath and then responding calmly. Admittedly, this might actually have it’s advantages at work if I start shouting back rather than responding calmly… but then the advantages might well be short lived!

I’m at least not that interested in eating everything on earth anymore – I’m noticeably more hungry than I was on duloxetine, but either the escitalopram has made my brain behave itself, or it’s just got used to it. Just need to actually work on eating better stuff now, and less of it!

Back to mood… It’s really not making me “happier” at the moment. I feel pretty rubbish, to be honest. I think that part of the reason is actually because I can’t freaking concentrate or remember anything! So many times I’ve wondered why someone’s not messaged me back, and I find a half-written text sat there waiting for me to finish it… This just isn’t like me!

Anyway, right now I’m struggling to think of any more to write, so I’ll sign off here.

Peace and love,

GM

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